Hung guy needs head

Added: Jerren Hamlett - Date: 18.11.2021 02:59 - Views: 35149 - Clicks: 5585

Top definition. Guy Code. The code by which each and Hung guy needs head man must and will follow. Any man found breaking the guy code will no longer be considered a man for the next 24 hours. This includes no sex, no beer, no sports, no barsno trucks, no video games, and unfortunately, no porn. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever! Unless you actually marry her. When questioned by a friend's girlfriend, you need not and should not provide any information as to his whereabouts. You are even permitted to deny his very existence.

Unless he murdered someone in your immediate familyyou must bail a friend out of jail within 24 hours. A best man's toast may not include any of the following phrases, "down in Tijuana", "one time when we were all piss drunk ", or "and this girl had the biggest rack you ever saw". Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella. The minimum amount of time you have to wait for another man is 5 minutes. The maximum is 6 minutes.

For a girl, you are required to wait 10 minutes for every point of hotness she scores on the classic scale. Bitching about the brand of free beverages in your buddy's refrigerator is forbidden. But gripe at will if Hung guy needs head temperature is not suitable. A friend must be permitted to borrow anything you own - grill, car, firstborn child - within 12 hr notice. Women or anything considered "lucky" are not applicable in this case. Falling on a grenade for a buddy agreeing to distract the skanky friend of the hot babe he's trying to score is your legal duty.

But should you get carried away with your good deed and end up getting on the beast, your pal is forbidden to ever speak of it. Do not torpedo single friends. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

Before dating a buddy's ex you are required to ask his permission. If he grants it, he is however allowed to say, "man, your gonna love the way she licks your balls" Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to pick a Buffalo wing clean.

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No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. You must offer heartfelt condolences over the death of a girlfriends cat, even if it was you who secretly set it on fire and threw it into a ceiling fan.

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While your girlfriend must bond with your buddies girlfriends with in 30 minutes of meeting them, you are not required to make nice with her gal pal's boyfriends- low level sports bonding is all the law requires. Unless you have a lucrative endorsement contract, do not appear in public wearing more Hung guy needs head one Nike swoosh.

When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may always ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing. If your girlfriend asks to set your friend up with her ugly, whiny, loser friend of hers, you must grant permission, but only if you have ample time to warn your friend to prepare his excuse about ing the priesthood. Only in a situation of mortal danger or ass peril are you permitted to kick another member of the male species in the testicles. Unless you're in prison, never fight naked. This includes men who aren't wearing shirts.

If your buddy is outed outmanned, or too drunk to defend himself, you must jump into the fight. Exception: if during the past 24 hours your friends actions have caused you to think "what this guy needs is a good ass wuppin ", in which case you may refrain from getting involved and stand back and enjoy. Case closed. Fives must be called at all times when getting out of your seat. If not, your seat is up for grabs. However, " house rules " may come into effect, in which case it is left up to the Hung guy needs head of the seat.

Shotgun can be called on anything where a shotgun applies. If you ever compliment a guy's six pack, you better be talking about his choice of beverage. Never your girlfriend in ragging on a buddy of yours, unless she is withholding sex, pending your response. Phrases that may never be uttered to another man while lifting weights: "Yeah, baby, push it!

Are you a Sagittarius? Never hesitate to reach for the last beverage or pizza, but not both. Never talk to another man in the bathroom unless you are on equal footing : both urinating, both waiting in line for all other situations an "I recognize you" nod will do just fine.

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Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch nearby, hang up if necessary. You can not rat out a friend who show's up to work or class with a massive hangover, however you may: hide the aspirin, smear his chair with limburger cheeseturn the brightness on his computer way up so he thinks its broken, or have him d every seven minutes. If you catch your girl messing around with your best friend, let your states crime of passion laws be your guide.

If your buddy is trying to hook up with a girl, you may sabotage him only in a manor that gives you no chances of getting any either. Before allowing a drunken friend to cheat on his girl, you must attempt one intervention. If he can get up on his feet, look you in the eye, and deliver a "fuck off" then you are absolved from all responsibility.

Later on it is ok that you have no idea what his girlfriend is talking about. The morning after you and a babe, who was formerly "just a friend", go at itthe fact that you're feeling weird and guilty Hung guy needs head no reason not to jump on her again before there is a discussion about what a big mistake it was. If a buddy has lint, an eyelashor any other foreign object on his hair or face, under no circumstances are you permitted to remove it.

However an appropriate hand gesture may be made to make him aware of it. An anniversary is recognized on a yearly basis, under no circumstances will anything be celebrated in an interval other than a year When using a urinal in a public restroom, a buffer zone of at least one urinal will exist at all times. If the only empty urinal is directly next to an occupied on, then you are still required to wait.

Exception: at a sporting event where a line has formed to use the pisser When coming to a room which you know is occupied by your friend and possibly another girl, you must knock and wait for an adequate response. If no response occurs, and the door is locked, a 10 minute period is required before knocking again. The only time dicking over a buddy for a girl is legal, is when the girl ranks Hung guy needs head 8 or above on the scale. A mans gotta scratch what a mans gotta scratch. This applies to picking as well. Let the man be. No man shall ever watch any of the following programs on TV: Figure skating Men's gymnastics Any sport involving women unless viewed for sexual purposes If you accidentally touch or brush against any part of another man below the waist, it is an understood accident, and NO apologies or any reference to the occurrence is necessary.

No man shall spend more than 2 minutes in front of a mirror. If more time is required, a three minute waiting period must be allowed before returning to the mirror. Any dispute lasting any longer than 3 minutes will and must be settled by rock, paper, scissors. There is no argument too important for this determining method. No man will ever willingly watch a movie in which the main theme is dancing, and if a man shall happen to view such a movie it is only acceptable if Hung guy needs head with a girlfriend.

Only acceptable time when a man is allowed to cry: when a heroic dog dies to save his master. When your date is using her teeth. The day Anna Kornikova chooses a husband. If a bet is made, and the challenge is completed, then the bettor may recoup his money by immediately completing a more daring challenge. If he refuses the challenge or chooses not to propose one, then and only then, must the money be paid.

Masturbate often. If a hot girl shall happen to pass by while you are in an arms reach of your buddy, you must, and will, tap him on the shoulder to make him aware of the babe. A man's shoes may not intentionally match any other Hung guy needs head of clothing on his body. No comment shall ever be made to a man about how much he is sweating.

In fact, there is no need bring notice to any body part which he may be sweating from. No man shall ever allow anyone to speak ill of The Simpsons or any Rocky movie. Exception: Rocky V You have not made any mistake if you find that there are extra pieces after reassembling or assembling an object. In fact, you have just found a way to make that object more efficient.

There are is never an occasion in which any shirt without buttons may be tucked in. Exception: when you are participating in a organized sporting event Hung guy needs head still escapes all reasoning as to why they even make them in adult sizes.

Any object thrown with reasonable speed and accuracy, MUST be caught.

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No man shall ever keep track of, or count, the amount of beers he has had in a night. Under no circumstances may two non-related men share a bed or anything which can be perceived as a mattress. In an Hung guy needs head room, car, ect. If you jiggle more than twice, your playing with it. A man shall never help another man apply sun tan oil. The guy who wants something the most is responsible for getting it. If your friend says " Lick my nuts " as a way to put you downdon't try to be funny by saying "OK" and moving your head towards his crotch, two homosexual references in a row are just plain scary If you say ouch, you are a pussy!

It is the God given duty of every man to assist any other man that may be in need of assistance in obtaining every guys dream threesome with two girls. Dude, you have to distract this chicks dirty friendit's guy code! Hung guy needs head 17 Word of the Day. A Bloomer is someone with a bright outlook on life who is optimistic in nature.

Bloomer's frolic in every opportunity to be happy and try to make the most out of life.

Hung guy needs head

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